Dating Handbook: Pickup Lines and Driving Stories

I just heard your conversation with Chris (looking for love in traffic) on this weekend's show. I submit that you may be overlooking a significant segment of the female population that would respond much more favorably to a cat in the car. Think about it--if a woman prefers cats to dogs, wouldn't she respond more favorably to a man who likes cats? I mean, how often do you see a man driving around with a cat in his car? Couldn't this be uniquely attractive? Wouldn't it say something about the man--that he throws convention to the wind, that he is uniquely confident in his masculinity? This is a man who cares more about his feline friend than about outward appearances or what others may think or say. He is a rugged individualist.

Whereas hauling a puppy around with you may seem suspect to some women, bringing your cat would never rouse such suspicions. There are also practical implications. If you're out cruising and the puppy needs to--ahem--do its business, you're going to have to find a place to stop and let that happen, or else [left to your imagination here, what a woman might think if she actually saw that your puppy had taken care of business INSIDE the car]. With a cat, you just get an extra litter box and throw it in the back on the floor. Remember this if you wonder why riding in your car makes your cat nervous, Chris. I think that a lot of cats would enjoy riding in cars more if they had that extra feeling of security. They love to roam around the car and look out the windows. While the motion and noise may make them nervous at first, they will quickly acclimate and soon beg to go with you whenever you go out (OK, maybe I'm stretching this a bit).

I am actually speaking from experience here about the cat riding in the car (not about results meeting women, being happily married). While I can't disagree with the universal appeal of a puppy of any sort, I think that you're off-base here with Chris. There could be serious repercussions from using the puppy method--namely, if it DOES work, he could be stuck living a lie, having to pretend to be a dog person while really being a closet cat person, or WORSE, giving up his cat for a woman, thereby denying his true nature, living in misery for the rest of his life.

Trying to dig myself out of it (both the snow and the rather large pile of BS I seem to be standing in at the moment) in Kalamazoo,

Doug MacLean

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