Automotive Rewrites: Literature Gets the Car Talk Treatment

Staff Blog

Staff Blog | Mar 08, 2017

Here's what we've got so far. We know you'll come up with some great ones too. Send us your lines or post them on Facebook. We'll add in our favorites later on.

  1. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single mechanic in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a boat.

  2. Mrs. Dalloway said she would buy the Volvo herself.

  3. All Ray could mumble, after trying to remove the back head on the F150, was “the horror, the horror.” 

  4. Call me Fishtail.

  5. It was the best of timing belts, it was the worst of timing belts. 

  6. Miata, light of my life, fire of my loins. 

  7. Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a fully rebuilt transaxle with optional torque converter, on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed.

  8. All Camry-owner families are alike; every VW-owner family is unhappy in its own ways. 

  9. A screaming comes across the Skylark.

  10. I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked, dragging themselves through the Citroen Service Manual at dawn, looking for an angry fix, angrily. 

  11. Gregor Samsa awoke one morning to find himself transformed in his bed into a giant Volkswagen beetle. 

  12. There is no doubt that the DeLorean was dead. This must be distinctly understood, or nothing wonderful can come of the story I am going to relate. 

Thanks to Samuel Ladnier Michael Gerald McDonald, Jessi Ramsey Golden and Lucien Jacquet for numbers 6, 10, 11 and 12.

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