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A Few of Your Thoughts Regarding the Worst Car of the Millennium

Car: Corvair

Ten excuses to own a Corvair:

  1. The dog loved the large windows.
  2. It would start without a key.
  3. Light front end hopped over curbs easily.
  4. Heavy exhaust smoke discouraged tailgaters.
  5. It looked so dorky that you could speed in front of the cops with impunity. (It didn't have the cop-appeal of a Mustang or Corvette.)
  6. Smoke from gasoline heater kept spiders, mosquitoes and stinging insects out.
  7. Self-changing oil.
  8. Nobody would steal it.
  9. The ad valorem tax was low.
  10. It was better than riding MARTA (Metro Atlanta Rapid Transit Authority).

 

John "Bart" Simpson


Car: Yugo

"About 15 years back, an acquaintance of mine filed for bankruptcy. When all was said and done they were allowed to keep one vehicle (for transportation) and had to give one back to the bank. They were going to turn over the newer car (which they owed more on), but the bank wouldn't accept it. The Bank of New England took a 1976 Bobcat (with no money owed on it!), excusing in exchange the debt on a Yugo (with $2,400 owed on it). I'd say that means the Bank of New England nominates the Yugo."

Bob Emmitt


 

Maverick

Car: Ford Fiesta

"The Ford Fiesta was truly a marriage of bad design and bad execution! First of all, the idea of having every country from East Sudan to Liechtenstein supply Ford with parts for this junker was ridiculous. How many times did owners of this lemon hear those immortal words, "Well, your air filter is on its way from Pakistan, and it costs $50"? Have you ever looked under the hood? There are more flags under a Ford Fiesta's hood than out in front of a West Hollywood Youth Hostel! And it handled like a bumper car! You'd have as much chance of cornering at speed in the thing as you would of nailing jelly to the wall! The sure sign of a car's staying power is how many of them are still on the road! In other words, that can of Coors you've just opened was probably a Ford Fiesta in its previous life!"

Peter Sheppard


Car: Renault Alliance

"The Renault Alliance proved the adage that nothing bad will happen to the person who owns a French car, because it already has."

Gene Ott


 

Maverick

Car: Ford Maverick

"The 1971 Maverick should be awarded the prize for car that did the best job promoting the Japanese automobile industry."

Ida Swearingen


 

Volare

Car: Chrysler Volare

"How dare you nominate the Chrysler Volare for worst car of the millennium! No other car has given me so many memories: the muscle tone developed by simultaneously flooring the gas and brake pedals at every stop (or even slow-down) to keep it from stalling; the friends we made when the car stalled while turning onto a busy street, blocking three lanes of traffic during rush hour; the bonds of friendship tested and proven while pushing the car long distances; and the fun and exhilaration of stopping at a light, popping the hood, jamming a screwdriver into the starter, starting the car and getting everything back in place before the light turned green again."

Siobhan Keenan


Car: Plymouth Horizon

"I didn't have any real problems with it in my four years of driving my Plymouth '86 Horizon, except for the humiliation I experienced when the dealer laughed at me when I tried to trade it in."

Linda Getz


 

Model T

Car: Ford Model T

"My nomination for the worst car of the millennium is...the Model T Ford. This car started us on the inexorable path to fouling our air; building on our forests and farmlands; leaving our cities to rot and decay; and enticing us to become a nation of fatties, disrespecting our natural resources and killing each other on the highways we have made by paving over our beautiful country! The only good things about that car are that we don't have horse poop all over the place anymore."

Judith DiBiase Bennis


Car: Ford Pinto

"Clearly you, like so many Americans, missed the point of perhaps the most innovative safety feature in automotive history. The Ford Pinto was obviously designed so that, in the event of a rear-end collision, the entire vehicle instantly became a safety flare. In the 25 years I spent as a Detroit Police officer, I came to appreciate a car that announced its location and the fact that an emergency existed without having to wait for someone to actually call 9-1-1. It is a shame that prejudice and the irrational fear of a fiery death led to the demise of this American classic. The Ford Pinto, like the Tucker before it, became a victim of a society unwilling to embrace innovation."

Ric Harris


 

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