World History According to College Students
I thought Tom and Ray might be interested in a few
highlights from the new book, "Non Campus Mentis: World History
According to College Students". Enjoy!
"History, a record of things left behind by past generations,
started in 1815. Thus we should try to view historical times as
the behind of the present. This gives incite into the anals of
the past."
"Civilization woozed out of the Nile about 300,000 years ago.
The Nile was a river that had some water in it. Every year it
would flood and irritate the land. This tended to make the
people nervous."
"Judyism was the first monolithic religion. It had one big God
named 'Yahoo'."
"Noah's ark came to it's end near Mt. Arafat."
"These pre-Socratics lived long before Plato and were not
decisively influenced by his work."
"Plato invented reality. He was teacher to Harris Tottle, author
of The Republicans."
"Socrates was accused of sophmorism and sentenced to die of
hemroyds."
"Cesar inspired his men by stating, 'I came, I saw, I went'.
When he was assinated, he is reported to have said, 'Me too,
Brutus!'"
"Eventually Christian started the new religion with sayings
like, 'The mice shall inherit the earth'. Later Christians
fortunately abandoned this idea."
"Romans persacuted Christians by lionizing them in public
stadiums."
"Without the discovery of the flying buttock it would have been
an impossible job to build the Gothic cathedral."
(Regarding the Black Plague): "Death rates exceeded 100% in some
towns."
"This was a time of stunned growth. The plague also helped the
emergence of English as the national language of England,
France, and Italy."
"Renaissance merchants were beautiful and almost lifelike. They
enriched themselves by planting wool and selling it for
clothing. They increased these profets by paying interest to
people who borrowed money from them. This produced even more
grits for the mills of change."
"Hitler, who had become depressed for some reason, crawled under
Berlin. Here he had his wife Evita put to sleep, and then shot
himself in the bonker."
"The Allies landed near Italy's toe and gradually advanced up
her leg, where they hoped to find Musalini."
"Stalin, Rosevelt, Churchill, and Truman were known as the 'big
three'."
"Unfortunately the Second World War was not concluded until
1957. A whole generation had been wiped out in two world wars,
and their forlorne families were left to pick up the peaces."
"The Civil Rights movement in the USA turned around the corner
with Martin Luther Junior's famous 'If I Had a Hammer' speech."
"The East and West made mends with each other. The Berlin Mall
was removed. Many Eastern Europeans experienced a new form of
arousal at this time."
"It is now the age of now. This concept grinds our critical,
seething minds to a halt."
(published by Workman Publishing of New York)
Tess
Alabama
[ As Read on Car Talk ]