My father's birthday is coming up and I'm trying to...

Dear Tom and Ray:

My father's birthday is coming up, and I'm trying to decide what to get him. Keep in mind that I've totaled two of his cars -- a Jeep and a BMW. His wife totaled his Volvo as well. I'll spare you the litany of other cars my brother and sister have totaled. My question is, What's the most expensive tie on the market? Thanks. -- The son of the most patient man on Earth

RAY: I'd get him a tie with your own car-insurance policy pinned to the back. I think he'll wear that one with a smile on his face.
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