I Hate Car Talk

[Our editor has replaced unprintable words with the much more
pleasant words with similar meanings in brackets]

Please Never Write a Book Again

Your book completely [inhaled vigorously]. My book was missing about 20 pages, which you may want to pass along to the publisher, but after reading the portion of the book that I had, I realized it wasn't worth the effort to return it and get another one. Please never write a book again. Ever.

--Jim

Another Cop That Doesn't Eat Donuts!

I have been a cop for over twenty years and I want you to know that all cops do not feast on doughnuts, as you've indicated.

--Darrell

Your Show is Making Me Sick

Your show gives me a headache. Your laugh makes me want to puke.

--Colleen

I Was Most Didturbed by Your Crudness

I was more than shocked by the coarseness of your opening remarks concerning an automatic flatulence maker. In fact, I was most disturbed by the crudeness and immediately turned off the radio so my 10-year-old grandson and I would hear no more.

What's next??

--Richard

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