Hall of Really Weird Mail

I'm looking for advice on how to build fuel-injected flame throwers. If you know how, or know of someone I can email, or a Web page I should check out, I'd appreciate it if you'd drop me a line.

Reg



I recently bought a car at auction. The previous owner was shot to death while in the car. I've done my best with warm soapy water and a gas mask but the odor and the stains still persist. I got a great deal on the car ($100 under Blue Book), so I really don't want to get rid of it. Any suggestions? Ed

I don't have a problem with the vehicle that I own, but I do have a problem with my washing machine. Can you guide me to someone who can help?

R.C.



Can anybody please tell me why boxer shorts have to have an opening in front?

Don't you know how utterly useless and damned uncomfortable it is to have an opening there, not to mention the unnecessary draft. Besides, it makes you feel like your fly's open on your pants 'cause half the time you're poking out of the damn hole in your underwear. This situation adds greatly to the already much embarrassing syndrome known as "male apparatus exposure paranoia."

And, come on now, do you really think we all use that hole for anything useful? I mean it kind of defeats the purpose of wearing underwear in the first place if you're hanging out of them most of the time anyway. If it weren't for that damn opening in front, I'd be tempted to wear boxers around the house, or even outside on a nice warm day, as if they were shorts.

Sincerely,

Allen



I'm sitting here wasting my time because the hospital called at 7 AM to tell me my open heart surgery was postponed until tomorrow. They need the operating room for a liver transplant.

My question: Because they'll be sawing me in half, I'm worried that the airbag in my '94 Grand Prix could blow me apart if I have a minor fender-bender during the first couple months after I am able to drive. Suppose I cover the airbag with paper, and wrap the heck out of it with package shipping tape? Would that protect me from being blown apart?

Jim



Last winter I was at a Honda dealership. While waiting to pick up our Civic after some maintenance work, I was reading an article in the paper about a person who committed suicide by sitting in a car in the garage with the motor running.

Question: Has the Clean Air Act changed this? No one at the dealership had any idea.

Anthony



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