Gentlemen:

I have been a fan of your show for years and rarely miss it when it comes on every Saturday morning. One thing that I noticed when I started listening, that has continued to the present day, is how you two address a caller when he or she first calls in.

When the caller is a female, your ears tend to perk up and the flirtation device in your loins goes into high gear. And God forbid that the female caller be a young chick in college or recently graduated. Y'all try to find out exactly where she is from, where she lives, family background, etc. I not only feel embarrassed for you, but also feel kind of nauseated as well. Now if the poor sap that calls in is a male, boy do the pleasantries go a LOT quicker.

Let me give you an example:

MALE:
Click ... Clack: Hello, you're on Car Talk. 

Male caller: Hello, this is Joe Shmoe from Podunk, Kentucky.

C...C: Yeah, yeah, Joe, whadda ya want?

FEMALE:

Click ... Clack: Hello, you're on Car Talk.

Female (in sexy voice): Hey, this is Jane Crane from Des Plaines.

C...C: Well, hi there. Is that Jane with a J?

FC: Well, yes it is.

C...C: HAH! I knew that! All Janes west of the Mississippi spell Jane with a J! So, Jane are you a student?

FC: No, but I graduated last year.

C...C: Any boyfriends in the picture? blah, blah, blah...

And so it goes. Frankly guys, I have seen your picture on the web site, and I see why y'all are on the radio. I say these things only to help you. I don't want you to be under any illusions that you might have a chance with some of these callers of the female persuasion. Just face it—you're old, gray, and don't stand a chance.

Keep up the good work, but snap out of that dream, fellas!

Dane Hawk
Wetumpka, AL