Are you tired of all those mushy "friendship" poems that always sound good but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a "friendship" poem that really speaks to true friendship.
When you are sad ... I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the sorry SOB who made you sad.
When you are blue ... I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you are scared ... I will rag you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried ... I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.
When you are sick ... stay away from me until you're well again. I don't want what you have.
When you fall ... I will point and laugh at your clumsy butt.
This is my oath ... I pledge to you 'til the end.
Why you may ask? Because you're my friend.
P.S. A friend will help you move.
A really good friend will help you move a body. -- Dave Atell