Thought someone might enjoy the following:

Classes for men at our local learning center for adults—Sign-up by April 25th
Note: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of Their contents, each course will accept a maximum of 8 participants each.

Topic 1: How to fill up the ice cube trays. Step by step, with slide presentation.

Topic 2: The toilet paper roll: Do they grow on the holders? Round table discussion.

Topic 3: Is it possible to urinate using the technique of lifting the seat up and avoiding the floor/walls and nearby bathtub? Group practice.

Topic 4: Fundamental differences between the laundry hamper and the floor. Pictures and explanatory graphics.

Topic 5: The after-dinner dishes and silverware: Can they levitate and fly into the kitchen sink? Examples on video.

Topic 6: Loss of identity: Losing the remote to your significant other. Help line support and support groups.

Topic 7: Learning how to find things, starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming. Open forum.

Topic 8: Health watch: Bringing her flowers is not harmful to your health. Graphics and audio tape.

Topic 9: Real men ask for directions when lost. Real life testimonials.

Topic 10: Is it genetically impossible to sit quietlyas she parallel parks? Driving simulation.

Topic 11: Learning to live: Basic differences between mother and wife. On-line class and roleplaying.

Topic 12: How to be the ideal shopping companion: Relaxation exercises, meditation, and breathing techniques.

Topic 13: How to fight cerebral atrophy: Remembering birthdays, anniversaries, other important dates and calling when you're going to be late. Cerebral shock therapy sessions and full lobotomies offered.

**Upon completion of the course, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

W.W. Hawkins

[ As Read on Car Talk ]